The Quilt Tops are not a band

Here are the three quilt tops:

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Up next: borders, cutting 300 miles of bias binding, making the quilt sammichez, quilting, binding, and then, my dear friends, the mailing.

It sound like a lot, but it really is all pretty skate from here. Fingers crossed for an April Fools’ Day arrival!

Pin Cushion Ring

People do do really dumb things after midnight.

Drive-thru wedding in Vegas, drunk tattoo, pink faux-hawks, watch CNN…

I cruise Pinterest like a pigeon trolling for popcorn. “pin ALL the projects I’ll never do!” and “save ALL the funny and relevant memes!”.

Except I couldn’t sleep tonight and I found this super-cute pin. And I gathered this stuff:

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And murdered an innocent medicine cup. Because reasons.

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Then I cut some scrap material into a shape vaguely resembling a roundish sort of a curvy circle-wanna-be, then stitched the world’s lamest running stitch.

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I gathered the thread up a bit (it sort of resembled a Nelly Olson bonnet. I always hated Nelly Olson.) and stuffed it with some fluff I found on the floor. (Don’t judge. I have fluff on the floor.) …pulled the thread tight, made a little noose (kind of sad, really) and made this:

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It was at this point that I realized that the murder of the medicine cup was unnecessary. I expect Dexter to be here any minute.

Then I remembered that I have a thimble that I hate. Behold, the Hated Thimble of Doom::::.

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I put some hot glue in the bottom, then crammed some
Little Scrappy Bits in there to add some height.

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Then I added more hot glue and then crammed the little beheaded Nelly Olson down into the top.

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I don’t have any ring-making supplies (thank Sauron for that!) but I have a whole pant-load of hair ties. I found one, conveniently, on my wrist because I always have a hair tie on my wrist. I secured it in double (grammar much? nope.) with thread. .

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There are few things in life that terrify me more than Gorilla Glue. However, because I really wanted to make this project work and because I have the world’s pissiest little glue gun, I felt like being brave.

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Gorilla Glue and fingers just don’t mix.

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After drying and checking to be sure my fingers wouldn’t have to be melted off my hand because of the GG, I can proudly show you that I made this:

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…and I think I’ll take up a collection so I can go get a manicure. Sheeeeesh…

Anyway, here’s a very non-contrived, non-artsy-fartsy close-up.

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supplies used
thimble, glue gun, Gorilla Glue, stuffing, 4×4 scrap of muslin, hair elastic, thread, needle, scissor, Purple Thang (yes, that’s what it’s called.) Medicine Cup to murder is optional.

Come Along, Audrey

This week I played with push-pins and did this:

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I’ve had that canvas for a long time, it was just collecting dust.

I also had this canvas:

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The original plan was to make a larger version of the “beach” canvas, but then I sat down and watched the doctor who Christmas special and started to draw.

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This is how it progressed:

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I just can’t bring myself to stick it with cup hooks and pins. It’s called “Come Along, Audrey”.

Now I’d really better get back to work. :) Allons-y!

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T-shirt Quilt Revisited

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It’s done!

It’s actually been finished for a while and I’ve made a couple of blankets since, but I got busy and forgot to blog about it.

…because I know you guys just live to read about what I do.

Here’s my signature Franken-corner:

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I’ve since learned how to do proper corners thanks to YouTube, but proper corners aren’t fun, so…No photos. And the one with proper corners is on its way to a friend, so maybe when he gets it, he’ll share his non-Franken-corners.

:P

I’m making another quilt and there are several “tech” shirts involved…that will prove to be an adventure.

Side note: I have no races scheduled on my calendar. It’s weird. And oddly…freeing. I’m actually training harder with no scheduled deadline; coach says its because I have a self-defeatist psyche that I have to work through.

Word.

Positive talk for the day: I will successfully fold all the laundry and drink at least a gallon an a half of water.

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Month of the Military Child

Every month has a dozen Causes and every Cause has a month. This month is The Month of the Military Child. I have three of those. (kids, not months)

I don’t want you to feel sorry for my kids and their friends. Pity is absolutely unwarranted. I’m also not going to compare my kids to your kids, as they’d be different anyway, what with being different people, and all. But I’ll tell you some things about my kids that might make you think a little more about The Cause of the Month.

**My kids are just kids. They don’t walk around in miniature PT shirts or salute their Dad when he gets home from duty. They don’t have high and tight haircuts, their rooms are a mess, and I have to jump through hoops to get them to do their homework.

**My kids know the value of time.. They know how special it is that they can see their father at the end of the day and they know that not seeing him for a week of field exercises isn’t a big deal. A week isn’t a big deal. A month is a bummer. A deployment will suck, but is manageable. An afternoon at the park with Dad?…priceless.

**My kids know about death. As the children of soldiers, they have friends who’ve lost a parent on the battlefield. They’ve made sympathy cards in art class. Please don’t speak in platitudes or euphemisms around my kids. They’ll feel sorry for you and think you don’t know any better. They know that Daddy may not come home when he goes Over There, but…

**My kids have faith in God beyond their years. They know that Jesus is their best and truest friend. They know they can count on Him. They know if Something Happens, there will be a reason; but they have faith that Daddy will come home and they praise God all the way to Green Ramp.

Military kids can make quick friends and tell 24hour time. They know all the acronyms (PT, PFT, ACU, HRC, NCO, OIC) and the biggest one of all is…

**My kids aren’t afraid to PCS. (that’s moving to civilians). They don’t particularly like it, but they aren’t scared. They know the boxes and movers will come, they know their stuff will be show up in the new place eventually, and they know they’ll be making new friends. They know how to pack their Bag of Special Stuff that the movers don’t get. My kids are excellent road trippers.

**My kids are respectful of the Flag, of old veterans, of Memorial Stones, of Wounded Warriors, of Generals, of Retreat and Taps, and military spouses, and other kids, and of Command Sergeants Major because they get it and can comprehend the hard work and sacrifice behind every single one of those things. Their best friends’ dad is a firefighter…those kids get it, too.

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My kids aren’t better than your kids, they may not be tougher or smarter. They aren’t more special than your kids. They are special, though. They’ve said good bye to friends, family, their dad, and their homes. Rejoice for them, however, because they’ve said hello to new friends and adventures. Most importantly, they’ve hugged their Dad and they know what a big deal that is.

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Quilting and Tolkien

In which I bastardize Tolkien but giggle anyway…

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I have pinned The Three Layers in the Middle Hallway.
One blanket to cover them all,
A million Pins to hold them.

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A quilt to shun the frigid air (conditioner)
Three layers to keep the warmth
(fleece so that I won’t itch too much when I really should shave my Hobbit-looking legs.)
The needle and thread from Lobby of Hobbies (whose heart can be turned by my debit card) has pierced the sandwich Cotton.
One blanket roll to rule them all and
a gazillion yards cut on the bias to bind them.

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The quilt will soon ensnare a new master, someone who has been waiting for two thousand years (or 4. whatever) and who had believed this project to have passed out of all knowledge. His patience shall be rewarded by great power and the ability to machine wash but lay flat to dry but not in direct sunlight and also don’t fold it but rather roll it up so as to avoid permanently damaging the guts.

The One Quilt will be complete soon. Like in another week or two.

Okay, maybe three.

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28 Pleats

Kilt #3…

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My respect and admiration for the craft of kilt-making is increasing hourly. real kilts…heavy, woolen beasts that nary a machine has touched… When I finally get these temporary/fun-run/semi-disposable ones finished, I hope to make some true kilts for my little clan. I’ll use leather buckles and tartan and stitch a gazzillion point one invisible stitches behind the pleats.

…until then, I’m having an illegal amount of fun learning how these bad boys come together.

Cheers!

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A Slacker Makes a Kilt

I made kilt! Sort of.

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It looks like a kilt, sadly, it’s not really all that authentic. Kilts don’t have buttons. Anywhere. At all. And apparently there’s some scientific way of properly measuring them, but I didn’t measure.

Like I said. Slacker

This isn’t a tutorial, as I have no idea what I’m doing. It was super fun, though, and I’ve got four more to make. I figure by the time I’m done with those four, I should know how to make a real one and may even swing for some authentic Tartan. As is stands, I spent less than half the cost of one Pre-made kilt on material for all five of us, including the pin.

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I love Hobby Lobby.

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I used pinking shears. I hate pinking shears. I didn’t want to sew edges if I didn’t have to, so…pinking shears.

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^^ The selvedge had a nifty red edge. Yay! No hemming!

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…and then I ironed. And ironed. And ironed. I almost had to turn in my slacker card.

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I didn’t want these gaps, so I top stitched the pleats.

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I had read on line somewhere that the underside of the pleats were supposed to be trimmed to avoid bulk.

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…fricking pinking shears again.

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The waistband…

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Kilts are supposed to have buckles. I didn’t know this until I’d already used buttons. Apparently, it’s a good idea to research historical garments.

Slacker don’t play dat.

The one thing I did know, is that kilts are supposed to have pins. The pins don’t hold the kilt together, but provide weight on the front apron to prevent, um…Marilyn Monroe moments. I made 5 pins for my clan at The Twisted Jeweler

We’ll be running this here’s the link

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(I never measured anything, but I didmake The Boy model for me. I made sure the apron [front panel] went from his hipbone to hipbone, and then again to make sure the pleats went from hip to hip across the back. My measuring tape is still dusty. And angry. …it may try to strangle me in my sleep…)

The rest of the kilts will have buckles instead of buttons, but I’m super happy with how this one turned out. It took one afternoon of puttering and 2 pots of coffee. Awesome stuff!

Now excuse me, I need to slack some more. Cheers!

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T-Shirt Quilt Day…whatever

The border has begun…

…slowly…

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Now I have this giant, mostly done quilt top hanging in my living room hallway.

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(the shoes in the hallway and by the door are fabulous little reminders. They remind me that I forgot to move them before I took that photo. Also, they remind me that I’m too lazy to move them and re-take the photo.)

How do you manage your projects when they have gotten too big for their britches?

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