I Want a Wife

In high school AP Comp/Lit, we had to read an essay called “I Want a Wife”.  This woman, I don’t remember her name, wanted a wife to wrangle the kids on vacation, etc., cook, clean…blah, blah, blah…angry 90’s drivel full of Alanis Morrisette-type whining.  However, for the next couple of weeks I’d like a wife.

...one ring to rule them all...

She’d have to be less needy than me, though, because I just couldn’t put up with myself.  I’m sick this week, so it would be preferable if she were healthy and well-rested.  Also, if she could have more patience than I have, that would be super-duper.  Obviously, this would be a Working Wife relationship, not a romantic one, so physically, if she could just be sort of squishy and comfy for hugging, I’d be happy.  …long nails, because I like my back scratched…

(sigh)…If this week’s chores (packing lists, kids, dog, vehicle, finances, FRG stuff, my own strep throat) has taught me anything, its this: wives are awesome.  We really are.  (and can I get a WOOPWOOP for single mothers out there working their tales off and doing everything all on their own!  You GO girls!  Here’s to you, Ms Bring Home the Bacon and Cook it, Too! **Ginger, I’m looking at you, kid.**)

When my husband is home, he is phenomenal, don’t get me wrong.  He makes time for the kids, for me, and to help around the house.  I’m one of the lucky ones, as far as that goes.  I’m loved and I know it; how blessed am I?! 🙂  When he’s not home, though…well…I’m sure you know.  There’s just a lot to do.

...there can be only one...

…come to think of it, though, if I did get a wife, she’d have to leave before my husband gets home from mountain training…awkward!


One thought on “I Want a Wife

  1. I nominate Yerttle for the next AFAP show-down!! Here’s my idea: why isn’t there a “help a spouse for a week” volunteer program? So many folks say “I do t know how you do it!” Well, would they like to find out? Come walk a mile in my shoes . . .
    And oh ya, first time my husband deployed, I soon developed a WHOLE new appreciation for single moms, especially the ones that don’t have “baby’s daddy” every other weekend. THEY are MY hero!

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